To the men of the world, I want to say something: It’s okay. Premature ejaculation happens to a lot of men. Don’t worry-- it’s not a medical problem. Premature ejaculation can happen at different periods in your life, and if you’re with someone who makes you feel bad about reaching orgasm too early, then maybe you should rethink being with that person. Here are some tips for premature ejaculation:
1. Wear a condom. First, you really should be wearing a condom anyway to avoid pregnancy and STD transmission. Remember that a condom is a barrier; therefore, it makes the sensation of penetration a little less sensitive. That does not mean you lose all sensation, it just means it’s not as intense. Some condoms even have a gel in the tip to decrease sensation. Plus, condoms make cleaning up a lot easier. It’s a win win!
2. Don’t think about it. When you have a song lyric in your head and don’t want to say it, but you keep thinking about not saying it so much that you wind up saying it? It’s kinda like that, when you think about it a lot, you’re going to do it. Try to distract yourself, preferably by focusing on your partner’s pleasure for a while.
3. Masturbate more. Yeah, I know-- you’re so excited about having sex that you never want to masturbate again. If you masturbate the day you’ll have sex, and the days before that, that will make you less excitable, and thus you can last longer.
4. Have your partner help out. Your partner may be able to help take your mind off your focus, by talking to you, changing the rhythm and friction. I have a friend who would call out math problems to her boyfriend to redirect his attention. The important part is to make sure you have communication about expectations and desires with whoever you’re getting down with. Sex involves a lot of experimentation and learning about your own body. Take time to pause, figure out what feels good for you and your partner, and you will be on the path towards better sex.